Dude Banned From Spirit Airlines For Doing The Most Unspeakable, Unheard Of...No Wait...He Vaped In The Bathroom

CNN - A 30-year-old Spirit Airlines passenger on a flight from Detroit to New Orleans recently got himself banned for life after deciding to take a smoke break in the plane’s bathroom.

An attendant on Flight NK 985 told a deputy on Tuesday that she saw him take a drag from an e-cigarette and exhale into a bag, said Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s spokesman Capt. Jason Rivarde. She admonished him.

The St. Petersburg, Florida, resident then got up and headed for the restroom, according to a report filed with the sheriff’s office. While he was in the bathroom, the plane’s smoke alarm went off.

The passenger was not arrested but he may never again fly with Spirit: The deputy’s report said the company banned him for life.

Hold the phone. Hold the god damn phone. THAT’S what it takes to get banned off Spirit? Vaping? Vaping is what it takes? Get outta here.

People have committed countless atrocities in Spirit plane bathrooms. Babies have been conceived, black tar heroin has been free based, pilots have left the cockpit to take a shit and just let the plane fly itself. And that’s just the latrine. We KNOW what happens in the aisles of those planes. Twerk contests, people pissing on each other, jizz flying around like the entire cabin is in a silly string fight, it’s a brave new world when you’re 35,000 feet up on Spirit. But VAPING is where they draw the line? Wild. I woulda guessed if all you did was vape on a Spirit plane they’d hire you to fly it. Gotta be more fit for the job than the pilot school dropout they give a phony license to that they probably pay Milmore to photoshop in the same way the PMT boys sneak into the Super Bowl.

But hey, I guess this is a good thing. Now we know where they draw the line on Spirit. Have anal with your girlfriend in your seat, fine and dandy. Take a puff of your vape in the bathroom- banned for life.